Now she has stated that he is a player because he did not return whatever she thought she was owed by her actions. Get his name and run it through the county records where you live.
Also use other resources like your appraisal district to make sure everything a person tells you checks out.
When you're IM'ing, they take forever to answer, because they're online with about 20 other people.
If they are in a relationship, or married, they will suddenly just go offline in the middle of a chat.
Then meet and take it from there using your brain, not your heart... Most of the time they will fall short somewhere and you will have to let them go...