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We know they're a pain, so Matchopolis has several active technologies that continuously remove undesirables from the site, and typically prevent their signing up in the first place.

Are you dreaming of dating in California or romance in New York?

One divorced man of my age, who has been on these sites for six years, said that the first woman he met was £50,000 in debt, another wanted him to give her £350 to get her car out of the garage and a third hadn’t mentioned that she had severely impaired vision — the ultimate blind date.

After my partner died, I thought to myself: ‘Online dating is the modern way to go.’ I was pretty certain I would soon find my ideal person, somebody clever, witty, good-looking, successful, excellent company, open to new ideas, well-read and with a sense of purpose in life.

If I’m looking for him, he must be looking for me, I reasoned.

He said he was a writer, so that was clearly, for me at least, a major plus.

The idyllic cottage was monstrously untidy, littered with papers, dusty and dirty and he was fusty and not very clean either.

Our awesome web programmers have made it as easy as possible to create a Matchopolis account - all you need to do is complete our one-page signup with an external email address. Current statistics show more than a third of marriages in the past 8 years began online.